A possible addition to your list

Nathan,

I was sent a link to your website the morning after (yeah, yeah) I went into a furious diatribe over an AXE commercial I had just seen. Geeky guy in tighty-whiteys (not the gross part) sprays AXE on, goes to a club and gets bitten by a mosquito. (Where is this club? The bayou?) The mosquito then GETS EATEN by a frog, which then GETS COOKED at a upscale restaurant and served to a 900 year old man. The geezer looks up from his dish that contains the REMAINS OF THE FROG to see a stunning supermodel bending down over him with her hand outstretched to his groin, which leads to a shot of said geezer lying on a bed with his collar undone and a blissful smile on his face. Close up of said smile and face, pan out to see that very picture ON HIS TOMBSTONE.

But wait, we're not done! The very end of the commercial consists of two worms coming out of the earth to form a heart!!!!! Is this supposed to be cute?  Or a subtle message that using AXE WILL KILL YOU!! Are we equating this spray-on deodorant with death? What the hell is this?! AAAAAARGGGHH!!!!

Maybe this would distract the FCC from Janet's stupid boob trick - which was just a half-step up from what the cheerleaders were jiggling the entire effin' game.

Stephanie